You never think it’s going to happen to you. When you find out, no one cares. I had a best friend, he doesn’t deserve to be my best friend anymore. He doesn’t care about me, doesn’t care about my life. Well fuck you. I can deal with this by myself. Who needs to have children naturally anyways? Psha natural conception, that shit is cliche. All I want is a hug. Just a god damn hug.
As I ponder on this day, the 21st of September, I realize it’s my birthday. Yay. I have survived 18 years on this planet. I didn’t know if I would make it, if I COULD make it this far. It really did feel like yesterday I was in a happy family home and we were a full house. As much as I enjoy the freedom, I miss the 6 of us, working and having fun as a family. I remember one horse show we went to as a family. My dad never saw me show, not once. And one day, he left the truck and came to the ring I was showing in. I got so excited, asking him to watch my rounds on my pudgy little pony who went over the moon for me. He did, and I won a ribbon. With both my sisters, my mom and my dad, and my brother watching from the truck, I never thought I would come down from this high, figuring that that’s how families should be. I love my mother, she has gone to the moon and back for me, I couldn’t ask for anything more. She’s become both a mother and a father for me, and I love her for doing that. 18 years, and this is what it becomes. Thank you mom, thank you everyone for being who you are. You have all made my life worth it :)